i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
why is half of my head shaved?
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