fuck your aforementioned shoe
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
