I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
