Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
