Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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