After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
He better not be in your backpack
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
