watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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