i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
