This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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