Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
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