well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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