Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji

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(210): View more from Texas

I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.

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(712): View more from Iowa

she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"

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(509): View more from Washington

Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much

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These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Read it at the TFLN blog
(985): View more from Louisiana

Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.

(1-985): View more from Louisiana

Do I have a choice?

(985): View more from Louisiana

I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.

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(817): View more from Texas

Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.

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(904): View more from Florida

My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.

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(208): View more from Idaho

The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO

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(719): View more from Colorado

If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.

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