i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
