She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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