If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
