I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
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besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
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Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related