I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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