His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
