But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
