I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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