go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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