I am in a vortex of obligation.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
