At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
