what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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