Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
