I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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