worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Randomize
