I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize