How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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