I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
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he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
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Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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