at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
