Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
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