i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
