If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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