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• (858): View more from California

  So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.

  (1-515): View more from Iowa

  As in blowjob or cannibalism?

  (515): View more from Iowa

  I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  did u really fuck my little sister???

  (706): View more from Georgia

  im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"

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• 

  Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (512): View more from Texas

  I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening

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• (254): View more from Texas

  Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.

  (254): View more from Texas

  Tornado warnings are fun!

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• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (775): View more from Nevada

  Jake bring pizza.

  (775): View more from Nevada

  JAKE BRING PIZZA.

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.

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• (716): View more from New York

  I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?

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• (417): View more from Missouri

  Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again

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