haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
