Screwed.edu
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
