Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
