There is no way he is gay with that hair.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
