I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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