I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
The beer is more important than you right now.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
