She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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