Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
now i know why i became what i already was.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
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