Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
if only i could text you this smell
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I miss vodka workout Fridays
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
