Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
