What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
