In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize