my vag is so smooth its legendary
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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