It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
