the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
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