doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
