I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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